I wasn’t feeling exactly old as I drew closer to my 69th birthday, but I was feeling somewhat off my game. Which is why I watched five movies between Friday, December 18, and Monday, December 21. There was no prior planning beyond wanting to watch the two new Christmas horror movies debuting on the SyFy channel. All other choices were made by simply surfing Netflix, Amazon Prime and HBO Max.
First up was The Prom [2020] on Netflix. Directed by Ryan Murphy, Adapting the Broadway musical written by Chad Beguelin, Bob Martin and Matthew Sklar from an original concept by Jack Viertel - Martin and Beguelin wrote the screenplay - it stars Meryl Streep and James Corden. Here’s the Internet Movie Database summary:
A troupe of hilariously self-obsessed theater stars swarm into a small conservative Indiana town in support of a high school girl who wants to take her girlfriend to the prom.
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This was outlandish in the best possible ways. Streep and Corden play the self-obsession broadly and it works, leaving no doubt as to why their popularity has tanked. Chorus girl Nicole Kidman and failed actor Andrew Rannells aren’t as famous, but they complement the quartet’s bigger stars.
Jo Ellen Pellman’s small-town lesbian got my heart from her first scene, playing tough and wounded with equal skill. Ariana DeBose as Pellman’s deeply closeted girlfriend also tugs at the feels. Kerry Washington plays DeBose’s mother, a bigoted wolf in PTA clothing. Filling out the main cast is Keegan-Michael Key, the principal of the high school and a man who believes in the magic of the theater.
My regular readers know I’m a sucker for redemption stories. This movie has them by the fistful. The theater stars discover empathy they didn’t know they had. Bullying high school students figure out their actions are hurtful. There is even a surprise reunion for one of the stars.
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The characters are wonderful. The music is often corny, but never wrong for the scenes. The ending is utterly satisfying, no sequel necessary. If you’re looking for a movie that, despite some harsh scenes, will leave you smiling at its conclusion, The Prom is well worth viewing. I recommend it.
Toys of Terror [2020] was the first of the two new Christmas horror films that made their debuts on the SyFy Channel. Written by Dana Gould, whose writing credits include episodes of The Simpsons and who also works as an actor, the movie was directed by Nicholas Verso. Here’s the IMDb summary:
Just before Christmas, young Zoe, her brother Franklin and their family move into a secluded mansion with a dark past. While the adults focus on renovating the place, the bored kids find a toy chest hidden in the attic, and are delighted when the toys inside magically come to life. But bizarre events soon begin to take place - events that threaten the family's lives. As the special day dawns with gifts piled under the tree, the body count rises and the blood starts to flow. This original "scary-tale" will have the kids screaming for the holidays!
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Hannah [Kyana Teresa] has dragged her challenged blended family to a secluded spooky mansion which her, husband David [Dayo Ade] and contractor Emmett [Ernie Pitts] are renovating with an eye towards selling it for big bucks. What she hasn’t told them is the mansion used to be a children’s hospital where a grieving mother murdered all the kids. The rest of the seven-character cast: Hannah’s kids Franklin and Zoey, David’s grumpy older daughter Alicia, and nanny Rose [Georgia Waters]. Unless you count the previous hospital murders and the evil toys, the body count is low and predictable. That said, the movie has some scary moments.
The older actors are all at least okay in their roles. Teresa does a good job playing the mayor of Amity. Alicia [Verity Marks] shows believable teen angst and genuine moxie. Waters is the stand-out of this cast with her character’s sympathetic back story and her brave but haunted demeanor.
The ending? It is heartwarming and satisfying. No last minute “Boo! The toys are still alive!” Just an unexpectedly nice conclusion for one of the characters.
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This isn’t a movie for multiple viewings, but it’s definitely worth watching once.
Anna and the Apocalypse [2017] came highly recommended. My friends weren’t wrong. It is an excellent film, except that it’s not a film I ever want to watch again. Here’s the IMDb summary:
A zombie apocalypse threatens the sleepy town of Little Haven - at Christmas - forcing Anna and her friends to fight, slash and sing their way to survival, facing the undead in a desperate race to reach their loved ones. But they soon discover that no one is safe in this new world, and with civilization falling apart around them, the only people they can truly rely on are each other.
The movie was directed by John McPhail. Based on a novel by Barry Walso, it was written by Alan McDonald and Ryan McHenry.
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Ella Hunt is wonderful as the title character, a rebellious young woman whose dad [Mark Benton] is the custodian of her high school. The school’s authoritarian and fussy headmaster is played by Paul Kaye. Nice acting all around.
Anna’s fellow students are best-friend-who-wants-to-be-more John [Malcolm Cumming]; Chris [Christopher Leveaux] and Lisa [Marli Siu], who are boyfriend and girlfriend; activist and lesbian Steph [Sarah Swire]; and Anna’s rough-around-the-edges one-nighter Nick [Ben Wiggins]. More good performances.
The musical numbers are fun, even after Anna’s oblivious song-and-dance as zombies start slaughtering her neighbors. But things get depressingly serious. After a time, I can’t even really call this movie a dark comedy. It’s just dark.
John sacrifices himself to save the others. We last see him sitting against a wall and looking at a phone photo of Anna before he drops the phone and loses every last trace of his humanity. We get almost the same scene before Anna’s dad loses himself.
While we get some “relief” of sorts that Chris’ grandmother dies of natural causes before being killed by a zombie, the transformations of Chris and Lisa are heartbreaking. They touch hands for a moment before shambling off in opposite directions. Like all of the other zombies, what they were is gone forever.
Anna, Nick and Steph escape, but there’s no indication of any safe place anywhere. It’s a logical conclusion, but it’s not an ending that lifts my spirits in any way. This is simply not the movie that I wanted to see the night I watched it.
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Zombies have never been one of my go-to entertainments. If I were to count the zombie comics or movies I’ve enjoyed on one hand, I would not get to my thumb. I’m sure many, perhaps most, of you will like this movie. Mileage varies.
Superintelligence [2020] stars Melissa McCarthy, James Corden and Bobby Cannavale, all of whom are excellent therein. It’s directed by Ben Falcone and written by Steve Mallory. The summary from the IMDb goes like this:
When an all-powerful Superintelligence chooses to study average Carol Peters, the fate of the world hangs in the balance. As the A.I. decides to enslave, save or destroy humanity, it's up to Carol to prove that people are worth saving.
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There’s not much to spoil about this pleasant movie. Corden voices the A.I. and he’s perfect for the role. While I can’t see its logic in characterizing McCarthy’s character as average, I was impressed by its manipulating all sorts of things to achieving the laboratory conditions it seeks. I’d be lying if I didn’t admit I plan to take one of those ideas and change it slightly for a story I’m writing. Finally, Cannavale is fun as Carol’s romantic interest.
The government, scientists and computer geniuses tend to bungle a lot, but that’s because they are clearly outmatched by an A.I. that is playing a dozen moves ahead of them. All of the above are very likeable, which surprised me.
I was impressed by how the crisis was resolved. It was heartwarming and logical. I was also delighted by some of the guest voices that are heard in the movie.
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Superintelligence isn’t a bad way to spend 106 minutes. Sometimes, especially in the middle of a pandemic, you need to watch a movie that leaves you with a warm glow.
Letters to Satan Claus [2020] was the second new Christmas horror movie aired on the SyFy channel. I have praised it online as sort of the anti-Hallmark Hallmark holiday movie. Directed by Emma Jean Sutherland and written by Michael Zara, the movie stars Karen Knox as cynical reporter Holly Frost and a bunch of delightful character actors. Here’s the IMDb summary:
Holly returns to her hometown to make an Xmas special with a cameraman before promotion to TV anchorwoman. She'll have to face Satan Claus and horrible childhood memories of him.
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When Holly was a child, she was a self-centered brat. When told her parents can’t afford the present she wants, she writes an angry letter to Santa asking for them to be gone. Except she misspells “Santa” as “Satan.” Whoops.
Satan dismembers her parents and wraps them as Christmas presents.That was not a great Christmas for Holly and older sister Cookie [Perrie Voss].
Years later, the adult Holly is still toxically self-centered. She is an unlikeable big city reporter who wants the anchor job. Which she can get if she does a sappy holiday broadcast from her hometown of Ornaments. Her cameraman is a typical handsome Hallmark single father with a daughter. Holly tries to bang him in the back of the newsvan. Holly is frequently horny.
When Holly impulsively sends a letter to Satan telling him to eff off, Satan decides to bring his special brand of holiday gore back to Ornaments. The body count is impressive.
Here’s the thing about this movie. It’s funny and gory, but never disgustingly over the top gory. It mocks Hallmark holiday movies, but it’s got its own warmth. It’s a redemption story, but doesn’t give us the usual Hallmark resolution for Holly. It also features a non-binary Satan and Santa, both played by Jana Peck. That’s not remotely a plot point. Just something I thought was cool.
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I absolutely love Letters to Satan Claus. It’s one of the best movies I have seen turning this pandemic. I recommend it to all. If it comes out on DVD, I’ll buy for future viewings.
That’s all for today’s somewhat lengthy bloggy thing. I’ll be back soon with more stuff.
© 2020 Tony Isabella
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