3-HEADED SHARK ATTACK

3-Headed Shark Attack, the sequel to 2012's 2-Headed Shark Attack, was the top half of a SyFy channel double-feature on Monday, July 20. The second half of the bill was Zombie Shark, which I’ll review soon. Today is all about the three-headed people eater that had me cackling with delight.

I was not a fan of 2-Headed Shark Attack. You can read my February 2012 review of it here. However, I was eager to watch this sequel for two reasons: the casting of Danny Trejo, who I think I’d watch in just about anything, and a trailer which, though it spoiled some scenes, showed a much-improved killing machine.

3-Headed Shark Attack takes place at and around a floating research facility built in the Great Pacific garbage patch, which is a real thing. Let me clarify that.

The garbage patch is a real thing. To quote Wikipedia...

The Great Pacific garbage patch, also described as the Pacific trash vortex, is a gyre of marine debris particles in the central North Pacific Ocean located roughly between 135°W to 155°W and 35°N and 42°N. The patch extends over an indeterminate area, with estimates ranging very widely depending on the degree of plastic concentration used to define the affected area.

The patch is characterized by exceptionally high relative concentrations of pelagic plastics, chemical sludge and other debris that have been trapped by the currents of the North Pacific Gyre. Despite its enormous size and density (four particles per cubic meter), the patch is not visible from satellite photography, nor is it necessarily detectable to casual boaters or divers in the area, as it consists primarily of a small increase in suspended, often microscopic particles in the upper water column.  

So the garbage patch is a real thing, though not as visual as seen in the film. The mostly submerged research facility is probably not a real thing. Still a great setting for a monster movie.

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The title star of the movie makes its first appearance within five minutes of the start of the film. It attacks a secluded beach party with predictably bloody results. While the shark can’t stay out of the water for long, it can squirm its way on land for short periods of time.

The 2-headed shark never looked good to me. The 3-headed shark has a less comical appearance. It doesn’t look real per se, but it does look convincing. That’s all I ask from CGI.

Maggie [Karrueche Tran] arrives at the research facility to start her internship. She’s greeted by Professor Laura Thomas [Jena Sims] and Dr. Nelson [Jaason Simmons]. They are joined by students from an environmental organization. Among these students is Greg [Brad Mills], who used to date Maggie. All give good performances. Most of the cast members, even those in more minor roles, do the same. However, it must be said that Danny Trejo as a fishing boat skipper and wrestler Rob Van Dam as Stanley dominate every scene they are in. Deservedly so.

Some of the facility scientists are studying the enormous number of mutations being created by the patch’s toxicity. We only see a few of these creatures, but they are cool in a frightening way. I wish the movie had spent more time with them, but, alas, a certain tri-headed shark demanded more screen time.

The shark attacks the facility. The shark wins. The survivors make for the surface and try to escape the beast. You know how it goes.  Not everyone lives. What I found impressive, though, both in these scenes and in a scene on a party ship, was how many characters act in heroic manner, often at the cost of their own lives, to help other characters. When the deaths come, as, in this kind of movie, they must, I was moved. The deaths were not simply additions to the body count. They meant something.

Here’s where I heap kudos on director Christopher Ray and writers Jacob Cooney and Bill Hanstock. That kind of great character stuff doesn’t happen by chance. It’s in the script and the director gets it from the actors.

Something cool: the 3-headed shark mutates further in the movie’s final quarter. What first struck me as silly turned out to be very believable (in the universe of this movie) and an effective way to pump up the excitement and the horror.

The giant mutant shark’s diet consists of garbage and people. This is not a healthy diet and plays into the creature’s demise. Though that demise was something I’d seen before in an earlier SyFy film, it still worked for me. The first person to post the name of that earlier movie in the comments section gets a no-prize.

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3-Headed Shark Attack was one of the highlights of Sharknado Week on the SyFy Channel. I’ve got the DVD on order and will definitely watch it again this summer. I recommend it to you as well.

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The bloggy thing won’t resume its usual daily schedule for a while, but I’ll post new content as often as possible. Next up with either be Ant-Man or Sharknado 3: Oh Hell No!

See you then.     

           
© 2015 Tony Isabella